


Liebesfreud

by eexiee



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-15
Updated: 2016-08-15
Packaged: 2018-08-08 20:43:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7772743
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eexiee/pseuds/eexiee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Junmyeon has always been that kind of person your eyes just get drawn to. He’s got a bright face, a shimmering smile and twinkling eyes that Yifan’s never been able to ignore.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Liebesfreud

The first time they had sex was after winning an award - Yifan can’t remember which one now. It was a celebratory fuck, both of them a little tipsy and running on a crazy adrenaline high. Winning that award had meant so much to them at the time and jumping and hugging became kissing and touching and then it became more.

And God, Junmyeon was a sight in bed. Smooth skin, taut muscles, his rosy cheeks brightening with the physicality of it all. He was so flexible and pliant, his hips giving into Yifan’s grip just enough. His body was warm - so warm. Everything about him was glowing and everything about him made Yifan glow too, from the breathless way he said Yifan’s name to the soft moans of absolute pleasure and the sharp cries of pure bliss. 

Junmyeon has always been that kind of person your eyes just get drawn to. He’s got a bright face, a shimmering smile and twinkling eyes that Yifan’s never been able to ignore. When Junmyeon acts cute, Yifan is utterly charmed, and when he turns on the sex appeal...well, Yifan can’t resist that, either. 

That night, with Junmyeon perched on top of Yifan, a flush that complemented the kiss marks on his neck spreading to his chest, his eyes closed in sweet satisfaction, Yifan couldn’t help but wonder if they could be together like that for longer than just that night. 

The next morning when Yifan had woken up with Junmyeon wrapped in his arms, so small and soft, Yifan had nearly cried. Junmyeon was precious and Yifan hoped that he’d be able to express that to the perfect man in his embrace. He didn’t deserve someone like Junmyeon, he thought. Someone so earnest, hardworking. Someone who spent so many years chasing what sometimes seemed like an impossible dream. Someone who, despite his minimal recognition, did his best every single day and made sure to do his best to make everyone else’s lives easier and more beautiful. Yifan never thought he deserved someone like that. 

But Junmyeon accepted him. Junmyeon was so accepting, his heart was so open and full of love. He had so much of himself to give, and Yifan took it gently and nervously. 

Yifan touched Junmyeon a lot after that. He always had to verify that Junmyeon was real and that Yifan wasn’t just living in some too-good-to-be-true fantasy world. But Junmyeon was real, his beautiful body was real and the way he loved Yifan was real. The way he kissed and smiled and laughed. The way he embraced and cried and _lived_. They were all real. 

And once Yifan knew that this was his reality, he showered Junmyeon with affection when they were alone. He pampered the other leader with kisses and cuddles. Junmyeon had laughed, asking when Yifan had gotten so snuggly, but Yifan had just responded by pulling Junmyeon closer. Even skin to skin was never enough. He felt that even that couldn’t show Junmyeon how much he was loved. He got into the habit of sitting in bed with his sweetheart, holding him close and letting Junmyeon fall asleep to the rhythm of Yifan’s heart beating fast in his chest. Because Junmyeon had that undeniable effect, the one that made you feel your heart breaking in pieces in the best way possible. Your heart opened up, your emotions were allowed to breathe. Yifan cried sometimes, inexplicably apologizing for not treating Junmyeon better and Junmyeon always looked at him in the most befuddled way. He’d say that Yifan treated him so well. He’d thank Yifan. And Yifan would just cry harder, wishing there was some way to love Junmyeon more, because he deserved more and more and more love. 

And then it ended. 

It wasn’t that abrupt, if Yifan’s being honest. It was a long time coming. When things started getting rough at the company, at first, Yifan tried to hide it from Junmyeon. But it got worse and worse and suddenly Yifan felt like a shell of a person, only slightly alive when he had Junmyeon right there next to him. 

In the end, the breaking point was irrelevant. Yifan was leaving. He had to. He wanted to leave in secret, without the others knowing. He felt guilty. But Junmyeon found him. He’d asked if it was over, if everything was over. His eyes weren’t twinkling anymore. He wasn’t glowing. He just looked hurt, betrayed, almost. He didn’t cry or argue or try to feign nonchalance. He was just asking if it was over. 

And Yifan had so much to say, so much more explaining to do. He wanted to say that it wasn’t over, not for them, but that was a lie. He wanted to say it would all be okay, that it wouldn’t change anything, but that was a lie too. He had so many excuses, so many explanations.

But instead, he said “I love you” in a voice that was more choked than he’d hoped it would be. 

And Junmyeon, steadfast, ever forgiving and accepting Junmyeon, had smiled.

**Author's Note:**

> I've been emo over KrisHo lately and I wanted to express how I feel about Junmyeon via proxy..........and then this got angsty. Oops.
> 
> This took me about 30 minutes to write and I was procrastinating on a different fic.....so......
> 
> [Liebesfreud](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWV2WFW0PVQ) is Junmyeon's favorite BGM by the way.


End file.
